My kids work because they want money.

It is hard to find a job, even harder to get by without one; I do have some friends who have never been employed exactly, only hustling, working for themselves, with varying results. It’s possible but not probable.

I’m really sorry you are hurting so bad but we can use every sane person, if we give up things just get worse.

No, no, and yes.

No, you is the singular; y’all is the plural.

All y’all works because you might say “All of you all”, I suppose.

It’s still good where we are, is in a run down part of town, not generally even fast, technically, but still so good. Publix has good fried chicken too but the spicy Popeye’s, so good and the only ‘fast food’ I will eat. Even french fries I generally just make oven fries now, but I never even try to make fried chicken.

Doesn’t pot famously make food more enjoyable?

I agree, fast food is not worth what it costs. The reasonably quick food landscape has expanded though, we can get different things, better Mexican food, a Chinese fast to go place with some really good tasting stuff, a restaurant that advertises “curry in a hurry” even.

Popeyes is still good though.

This depends. Qi-Gon Jinn saying “concentrate on the moment, feel don’t think” oh my, and he does seem very dedicated and not so political.

But R2D2 gets it done. He is a great character every time he appears.

I compost (and save stuff for broth) and we have a sink disposal. It’s for the little bits of cooked food left on plates, are you composting those? The sink that has one is the least cloggy kitchen sink I’ve ever had, and as far as I understand they are pretty neutral in terms of waste stream.

Grease I agree shouldn’t go in there, that goes in the trash.

We have one, I like it. Never gross smelling, keeps the drains clear, seems to help the dishwasher run better.

The bras & underwear from Branwyn are great. The t shirts from Unbound are also fantastic, I haven’t tried their athletic stuff. Other brands I’ve had mixed experiences with, the socks from Smartwool I do love.

It’s hot here, not cold but Merino knits are remarkably comfortable all weather items.

I have not, but why not start by helping someone else cook, or inviting someone over to help you cook?

It does sound like an unhealthy obsession not an actual cooking problem but if it’s more like you just never did it and have built it up in your head, perhaps taking small steps and seeing that your fears are not fulfilled will deflate them.

I agree you don’t necessarily need to cook, assembling can go a long way, but if you want to cook that is a very good reason to cook!

I will say - as an experienced home cook, shit does (rarely) happen so maybe also taking a kitchen safety class and getting fire suppression equipment would help, practicing what to do if something does happen so you don’t panic at a small fire and let it become a big fire when it would have been easy to put it out.

I really love reading. When little, my mom said I read my way through the kids section in the library in like a year then moved on to the grownup side.

But then I had kids, and read magazines, short stories, and comics because I didn’t have uninterrupted time.

Now, when I do have a book I read it while husband is watching TV, we both have entertainment time that way. If we go to the beach I bring the e-reader, and read on days off - still a lot of comics as I’m still busy, and I love them, but more library books than when the kids were kids.

You don’t have to read books if you don’t enjoy them! Everyone is different. I read really fast and effortlessly (learned to at the same time I was learning to speak, it’s a language not a skill for me) so it’s a better pace for me personally than other forms of entertainment.

But of my kids, fewer than half read for pleasure. There are so many other ways to use your time that are just as good for you or better.

I will say it took me awhile to wrap my head around my kid being a son not a daughter. My concept of womanhood is quite broad, I really and truly did not see it coming, just thought she was dykey , for lack of a better word, still doesn’t seem distressed at all either but that may be because all the kids at school just accept kids are whatever gender they say, it’s no big deal to them, and siblings all immediately supportive. I didn’t lay my trouble adapting on them, it’s not his problem, it’s mine - just saying you have known a long time but she has not, she will adjust.

It’s ok here because I’m in a left leaning city, trans kid (my youngest) will be adult soon so can begin medical care whenever they can afford it; any daughters who are at all into men have IUDs, and in general everything has been ok, except for school but that kid is a little bit insulated because it’s an art school and they DGAF about the state saying they can’t use nicknames or preferred gender. So that is ok but the actual teaching in the academic classes has faltered, getting bad like when I went to school here, and it’s so disappointing after it had gotten so good for awhile.

Thanksgiving may be fractious because we have trans, communists, right wing, right-leaning, about half progressive leftist, one sort of prickly vegan (not prickly about us being omnivore, just more delicate sensibilities), it’s always very mixed and rowdy like that, tensions seem higher but OTOH my ex has become more reasonable.

Bracing for economic downturn, hopefully it lets some people get into houses, who cannot now. And hopefully can stay employed, pretty old so have made it through several recessions already.

What’s mmj? Medical weed? I like the cities here in Florida, but can understand, it’s not the right time to move here anyway, houses are overpriced right now and rent is too.

I changed my mind on marriage, it was never my dream but my now-husband really wanted us to be married, and it did help with his status at schools and stuff regarding my kids and mine with his kids, has streamlined a lot of stuff like signing up for benefits at work, I still think it’s kind of silly to license relationships, but it’s been a good experience overall.

I’m paid twice a month and they call it semi-monthly here though, husband is paid every two weeks and his company calls that biweekly.

I would never use bimonthly to mean twice a month, and haven’t heard anyone use it that way in real life; but the only thing that happens twice a month for me is payroll, so it hasn’t come up in conversation outside of that.

I guess I share in your outrage then.

Eh? Semi-monthly is twice a month. Bimonthly is every two months.

Semi-weekly is twice a week, biweekly is fortnightly, every two weeks.

They work the same.

We have plenty of trans people here, and one of the bigger LBGT communities. Obviously we also have rednecks in the boonies, like the rest of the country but plenty of openly queer people here, and a big scene.

Now, if you are boycotting because of the tone at the top, that makes sense, I support you. But you don’t need to worry about visiting if you want to, it’s safe in the cities.

Depends whether you want to just relax in the warm bathtub of the Gulf of Mexico, or be freezing in the water of the Pacific with its dramatic and beautiful waves.

When my kids were younger, before we had money, we had a “tree” each year that I’d put up after they went to bed. Always something different. One year lights in the coat rack, one year construction paper on the wall, one year my ex cut the top off one of the bushes outside and we sort of carved it into the cone shape, once an inflatable beach ball sort of tree, all sorts of different things but it was never an actual Christmas tree.

That stuff all sounds nice, I would just say to make sure you don’t burn yourself out or keep others from reciprocating your kindness.

I’m not that nice, though we do sometimes let homeless people stay, always have because we know some, I am happier when the workload at home is balanced between us, wouldn’t intervene in a fight because that’s too dangerous.

So I think if you are doing things to be selfless, like at the expense of yourself, watch out. As I noted in my original reply, you need to take care of yourself too, giving too much doesn’t work out better for anyone. You are a person too, just like the people you are trying to help.