I have long 2A hair with your goals and wear my hair slicked back and it took me a long time to figure out how to take care of it well so here are my tips:

Once you get it around the length you want, go to a good salon and get a trim. The outside layer of your hair gets the most environmental and UV damage and I bet you haven’t gotten that cleaned off since you started growing it out. Just this single item changed my mind from “I’m getting sick of long hair and I don’t know what to do with it maybe I’ll cut it all off again” to loving it more than I have in many years. It has more movement and looks way healthier and has helped me keep it out of my face.

Yes, wearing hair ties can cause your hair to thin at the front of your scalp, called traction alopecia. But only if you have some combo of weak hair retention, pull and tie your hair way too tight, and/or use too tight of hair ties all the time. This happened to me after a couple of years and switching to claw clips sometimes and changing some routine steps helped me recover most of it.

If you’re just chilling around your house try using a claw clip instead of a hair tie. I make a loop over the top of my horizontal index finger, curl my finger in to grab the hair, and then give my wrist a half to full twist so that the bend in the loop is facing down and the end of my hair is pointing up and clip it. It keeps all my hair out of my face without any pulling pressure.

Don’t use a fine, close toothed comb on your long hair. I recommend a combo of a wide space, fine tooth comb (hard to describe I wish I knew the name of it) or a paddle brush. I’ve started dropping the comb entirely and using just the paddle brush and my hair has had more body.

Find a nice shampoo and conditioner for your hair type and scalp oiliness. A nicer shampoo can be a benefit but there is a diminishing return on cost so you don’t have to buy the most expensive stuff on the market. Then work on figuring out a good shampoo schedule for your hair. Usually for me it’s one day on/one or two days off but my hair is very fine so it looks gross quickly when it gets oily (but again a nice haircut from someone who knew what I was looking for helped this out a ton, too). Every day, especially if you’ve spent all day with it tied up, use your fingers or a scalp massage brush to really stimulate your scalp. Not only does it feel amazing, it helps ensure good blood flow to your scalp follicles and clean up any sebum build up. On days you don’t use shampoo, either just do a massage with your fingers or just use water to clean your hair in the shower and do the massage. Depending on the moisture/protein content of your hair, use conditioner but infrequently. I use a very small amount of conditioner about once a week, but again I have fine hair. Only use the conditioner about halfway down your hair length to avoid weighing down your hair by your scalp, this can help you keep your hair healthy but keep from getting flat. Make sure to thoroughly wash the conditioner out.

I squeeze my hair out and then use old t-shirts to dry it instead of a towel and after a little bit of that I noticed my hair improve over using a towel which can roughen your hair and pull moisture out (allegedly). If you want to feel really fancy, pick up a cheap silk pillowcase, mine a few years ago was about $20. It’s very smooth so it helps keep your hair from getting snagged and tangley at night.

Now for product - I’m a recent convert over to using mousse. I hated how flat and no volume my hair looked when I didn’t want to wear it up, and how much it kept falling in my face. Mousse helped give my hair volume and hold it back without giving it that crisp look gels and hairspray can give or the oiliness of pomades. There are dozens of types of mousses on the market but look for one that advertised volume and medium hold. With your hair slightly damp, rub the mousse in your hands to activate it, flip your head down and your hair forward and run your hands and fingers through your hair from root to tip along the front half of your hairline and a little in the back. Scrunch your hair up and run your fingers through towards the back as you feel the mouse dry. Flip your hair around a little and then stand up and flip it back. Wet your hands just a little and run your fingers through your hair towards the back, adding a little bit of mousse if you need it and let it air dry. This should give you a good amount of volume and also help keep your hair out of your face (my least favorite thing about long hair.

I hope this helps you out and feel free to ask any questions. I’m not an expert but I’ve had long hair for several years now and I’m finally happy with how it looks both up and down