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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 25th, 2023

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  • wow aren’t you just a ray of sunshine.

    what does that have to do with deadnaming people?

    I guess you’re the expert here since you Googled a condition & now you know everything there is to know about it, right?

    let me break it down. over 12 years ago when I was diagnosed, among the better-known symptoms like mixing up numbers, “misremembering names” (especially those that start with the same letter/sound) was a frequently published symptom of dyscalculia (and dyslexia, FWIW):

    fast forward to 2013, in the DSM-5 they changed the definition of dyslexia and dyscalculia, removed them as diagnoses and instead replaced them with a more general diagnosis: “Specific Learning Disorder”, which among other things now requires that a person is “unable to perform academically at a level appropriate to their intelligence and age.”

    in my opinion, and this is just my non-professional opinion:

    1. if I tell someone I have a “Specific Learning Disorder” they’ll generally have no idea what I’m talking about. it’s easier and feels more self-consistent to tell them the name of the condition I was diagnosed with, even if it’s outdated.

    2. the new DSM-5 diagnosis doesn’t account for people like me who were able to excel academically despite difficulty with numbers and names. did I have to read numbers 10+ times to make sure I knew I had the right one? yes. do I still struggle immensely to do basic arithmetic in my head? absolutely. am I also a software engineer who sometimes has to work with numbers? yes. did I get straight A’s in all my math classes? yes. people with dyslexia and dyscalculia excel all the time by discovering and using their own coping mechanisms, so this diagnosis seems overly reductive to me.

    again, I’m not a professional. is it possible that my symptoms which were previously attributed to dyscalculia are just a part of my ASD? sure. but I’m pretty sure if I said I have trouble remembering Elliot Page’s name because I’m autistic, people still wouldn’t know what I was talking about, and I’d have an even harder time explaining it. so there you go.


  • for real, I’m pro trans rights and I still sometimes accidentally deadname Elliot Page because I have dyscalculia. if you ban me for that aren’t you being ableist?

    also yes context is very important.

    if I say “when Caitlyn went by the name [X], and she used [Y] pronoun, [Z] thing happened to [Y]”, I assume I will still get banned for deadnaming even though I’m innocently adding clarity to a conversation.

    to make things worse, if someone is trans and gender fluid, and I call them by a name or pronoun they used last time I knew about them, now I’ve committed a crime of which I had no knowledge.

    this blanket condemnation of deadnaming is just dumb. it requires nuance.








  • This is a very dangerous take, and it’s concerning how many upvoters you have, who are also not thinking critically.

    You seem to be forgetting that liberals and conservatives in this country are all Americans. We are all on one team, and foreign interests wish to divide us and convince us that we are enemies, when we are not.

    Watch this if you don’t believe me.

    Conservatives need liberals to exist as much as liberals need conservatives to exist. The day this country’s tensions between conservatism and liberalism die is the day the USA ceases to exist. That tension is at the core of our republic, literally since its founding, and it’s what makes us great, unlike any other nation on Earth.

    I wish more progressives would remember that.




  • solarbabies@lemmy.worldtoComic Strips@lemmy.worldXXX
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    3 months ago

    We’re going in circles now. I already asked you what’s the point of considering such a hypothetical theory (which you admitted isn’t practical) other than to distract from the real issue?

    Idk what to tell you about film other than… anyone can make a film about anything.

    The only thing stopping men from writing (or approving) more film scripts, books and other art about this very topic… is simply the lack of effort.


  • solarbabies@lemmy.worldtoComic Strips@lemmy.worldXXX
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    3 months ago

    You:

    this would probably solve itself if women hit on men as much as the opposite.

    Also you:

    you’re the one who interpreted it as me putting the responsibility on women.

    Okay dude. Whatever you say.

    And yes, societal change is hard, but just because you can’t think of any solutions, doesn’t mean they don’t exist. FWIW, there are plenty of practical ways to normalize behavior at the societal scale, some of the more violent & historically successful ones having already been mentioned earlier in this conversation.

    One of the most powerful (non-violent) examples that comes to mind: popular film.


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    3 months ago

    I’m sorry for patronizing but IMO you should really ask yourself: what/who are you playing devil’s advocate for?

    Because so far you’ve only made points that make you come off as:

    1. minimizing the real problem (men’s behavior)
    2. blowing tiny problems out of proportion (women’s behavior)

  • solarbabies@lemmy.worldtoComic Strips@lemmy.worldXXX
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    3 months ago

    … and where do you suppose those women learned that behavior?

    Such judgments have been written, by men, into practically every religious, historical and news-based text for the greater part of the last thousand years, and passed down as dogma to men, women and children alike under penalty of ostricization or in some cases, death.

    Brainwashing is not exclusive to one gender. And while inter-gender discrimination is not as well documented as inter-racial discrimination, both have existed as long as oppressors have made it their goal to weaken the oppressed by sewing division among them.

    Please, try reading some history before you go on the internet spouting harmful opinions.