22F here, almost 2 weeks ago I had unprotected sex w/ this one guy I was friends with for a tiny bit (I mean we both know he only wanted sex, he tried multiple times and I ended up not wanting to) then one day I got upset and I sometimes have sex to cope w my life problems (ik it’s not healthy and I’m not doing it again)…
Anyways, a few days after I started having a mild sore throat and I felt a bit tired/like my body was gonna get sick but I didn’t (I was also working at a retirement hone) anyways, yesterday after work I noticed a lump on my vaginal bikini line but now it’s more flat (I can’t tell if it’s a lymph node or ingrown?) I haven’t shaved for a few days so idk how it can be ingrown now? But I also had mild mild itchyness in one area on my vagina and was a small tiny red dot… I also got my period today too. I also have had very very mild nausea for the past week too which is weird… Anyways, he’s a douche bag and he barely even answered me after we had sex so I blocked him. I asked him prior to sex if he’s clean and stuff and he said yes and that he wasn’t sleeping w anyone else ant the time and he wouldn’t lie cuz it would mean disrespecting me. I know I shouldn’t have believed him anyways. I’m rlly ashamed and disappointed with myself for sleeping with someone whom I know doesn’t respect me… idk when the best time to test is, it’ll mark 2 weeks since sex on the 14th of December.
Go to a doctor. They’re good for this kind of stuff, better than the Internet even.
Once you’ve seen a doctor to get clarity on your lump, you might consider checking out a therapist too. Therapy can be very healing if you get a good therapist, and is totally worth it.
I can’t afford therapy and I’ve tried some free therapy and it wasn’t effective at all. Most of these issues root from me having a bad relationship with my dad in the past and being so emotionally deprived of male love 😭 I don’t know how a therapist can help that. Me and my dad are good now and have been for awhile.
Find a therapist that works on a sliding scale. You have options. Don’t give up!
What’s sliding scale? I know sliding scale for diabetic medications lol but not for therapy haha
It is basically a deal you make with a therapist for reduced-cost services based on what you can pay.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/therapy/how-sliding-scale-fees-work-in-therapy
Parents are tough!
The sooner you go to the clinic, the sooner you’ll get your results. Will probably be good news and then you can stop having to worry.
For what it’s worth, it’s almost certainly nothing. That being said, testing is free. Get it done to be sure. Be honest with your symptoms and don’t be shy, we literally don’t care.
Ask your Dr. they will be able to tell you when to test and set you up with an appt. to get it done. If you don’t have a regular Dr., no insurance, etc. Check with your local health dept.
I’m kinda embarrassed to ask… I ask quite often because I regularly get tested. I’ve always been negative thankfully prior but I’m worried now with this guy… there are health clinics that do testing for free and I think I can go there, so I will probably just go there to save some anxiety from asking my doctor again.
Doctors don’t give a damn. No need to be embarrassed. Plus, it’s your health on the line, you’re more important than whatever you believe the doctor is thinking. You matter, please understand that.
Could be nothing, but a swollen lymph node and a general feeling of malaise can be a sign of a new HIV infection. Fortunately treatable these days, but you really want to get some labs done.
Yeah I think I’m going to wait for the 3 week mark, I’m gonna do std panel test for almost everything… but. I heard HIV is mostly at the 3 month mark. But I still would like to know if it’s negative even if it’s a little early… atleast I could know I am negative before him. I’m praying it’s nothing.
The 3 month wait is for antibody testing. You can get a PCR test that can show a more recent infection.
I’m going to go in 2 days to a sexual health clinic and ask for test. I’m honestly not trying to book another appointment at my doctor. I want to see those rapid clinics where u get the result same day or 3 day. I’m soo worried. I’m trying not to think because the more I worry the more I feel symptoms. Like I started thinking so much now my left side throat is aching off and on. The nausea I got is much better it’s almost basically gone… idk where that came from… I hope I’m okay.
That’s great. Sexual health clinics with rapid test results are the best. An HIV PCR test should give you an answer in just a couple of days.
While your symptoms are probably just a routine upper respiratory virus, remember that anything they might find can be successfully treated.
It’s wonderful that you are being smart, protecting yourself and taking care of your health.
I’m super paranoid. Like I have rhinoplasty in turkey in 11-12 days and I’m freaking out because they do bloodwork there and I’m scared if they find hiv positive they will deny me. My parents also don’t know I have sex so they would kill me. I’m stressing so much. I was thinking of going to the clinic tomorrow (marking 2 weeks on the dot) or if they are closed the day or two after. I’m scared :/ and I keep asking the guy to go test before me because if atleast I know he is negative or positive it’ll ease me mind but this guy is taking his sweet time. He says “if you are so worried go yourself I don’t have the time right now”. And he won’t even answer me anymore. When I saw him he did say he was a bit sick I think. Idk why I’m so paranoid, I can’t stop googling and speaking symptoms into reality
Changes of it being hiv are probably pretty low, but get checked anyway. If you have spots and lumps on your vg that’s a sign something could be going on. Better safe than sorry with these things!
Yes, get checked out ASAP. I feel like I always get a little sick when sleeping with someone for the first time even with protection. Probably just from swapping spit. It’s probably not HIV but testing is a must.
I’d recommend against googling/webMD/chat boting symptoms, they seem to always say you have HIV, cancer or Lupus no matter what you put in. Its driven me crazy on more than one occasion until I learned to go to the doctor first.
Edit: If you think this guy has HIV and is knowingly spreading it you should ask the clinic about it. Lots of States/countries have laws about that. Not sure about where you live. It will at least protect other women from him in the future.
It’s not necessarily that I think he has HIV. He is 31 and he just doesn’t strike me as the one to go actively test himself usually and I don’t rlly trust him even though he told me he’s clean. I have really bad second doubt with the guy. I don’t talk to him anymore though cuz I blocked him but I’m so frustrated that he treated me like this and lacked answering me compared to before. Such an asshole move. I do not trust him.
