I’m super paranoid. Like I have rhinoplasty in turkey in 11-12 days and I’m freaking out because they do bloodwork there and I’m scared if they find hiv positive they will deny me. My parents also don’t know I have sex so they would kill me. I’m stressing so much. I was thinking of going to the clinic tomorrow (marking 2 weeks on the dot) or if they are closed the day or two after. I’m scared :/ and I keep asking the guy to go test before me because if atleast I know he is negative or positive it’ll ease me mind but this guy is taking his sweet time. He says “if you are so worried go yourself I don’t have the time right now”. And he won’t even answer me anymore. When I saw him he did say he was a bit sick I think. Idk why I’m so paranoid, I can’t stop googling and speaking symptoms into reality

What’s sliding scale? I know sliding scale for diabetic medications lol but not for therapy haha

I’m going to go in 2 days to a sexual health clinic and ask for test. I’m honestly not trying to book another appointment at my doctor. I want to see those rapid clinics where u get the result same day or 3 day. I’m soo worried. I’m trying not to think because the more I worry the more I feel symptoms. Like I started thinking so much now my left side throat is aching off and on. The nausea I got is much better it’s almost basically gone… idk where that came from… I hope I’m okay.

It’s not necessarily that I think he has HIV. He is 31 and he just doesn’t strike me as the one to go actively test himself usually and I don’t rlly trust him even though he told me he’s clean. I have really bad second doubt with the guy. I don’t talk to him anymore though cuz I blocked him but I’m so frustrated that he treated me like this and lacked answering me compared to before. Such an asshole move. I do not trust him.

Yeah I think I’m going to wait for the 3 week mark, I’m gonna do std panel test for almost everything… but. I heard HIV is mostly at the 3 month mark. But I still would like to know if it’s negative even if it’s a little early… atleast I could know I am negative before him. I’m praying it’s nothing.

I can’t afford therapy and I’ve tried some free therapy and it wasn’t effective at all. Most of these issues root from me having a bad relationship with my dad in the past and being so emotionally deprived of male love 😭 I don’t know how a therapist can help that. Me and my dad are good now and have been for awhile.

I’m kinda embarrassed to ask… I ask quite often because I regularly get tested. I’ve always been negative thankfully prior but I’m worried now with this guy… there are health clinics that do testing for free and I think I can go there, so I will probably just go there to save some anxiety from asking my doctor again.